I know Him

A rough day today....

no sleep for me or baby....cranky toddler....fighting and biting older kids....found out I missed a call from my hubby....missing broom and remote...messy house....sore breast...broke a ceramic dish....legs hurt from running....I could go on but I will stop...

To remember HIM.

Because He is all I need and I need him desperately. I don't want to appear like I need Him on just bad days but all day everyday on good days too.

I have been thinkin about joy...only Jesus can give us joy...yet, my circumstances a lot of times seem to zap my joy right out of me.

Joy commeth in the morning...the joy of the Lord is my strength...remember the joy of your salvation...these snippets of verses come to me as I type. Helping me to focus not on me but on Him...

A day like today wants to put me first...I keep thinking of myself and all my woes and sorrows...little things like why I can't type in purple anymore irritate me...!!

Yet I will rise and overcome me, myself and I because I know Him. He is my all and all...He has seen me through some awful times and He will see me through this day...

Let me fix my eyes upon Jesus for He came to overcome. And because of Him I am an overcomer. Why do I so easily forget who I am in Christ?

I am so so so looking forward to eternity right now. But God has given me another day and so I pray that I can make each moment count for eternity. I pray I can love, love, love on those around me as the Spirit inside works in me to do so. I pray that I can finish this race well because it will be so worth it when I hear, "well done my good and faithful servant." from a loving and mighty God.

Zaria's 7th Birthday

Yesterday we celebrated Zaria's birthday!!!

It was a lot of fun. We went to Chuck E. Cheese's and had a great time stuffing ourselves with pizza, salad, cake, and drinks. We also got a lot of tokens to play games...we were having soooo much fun we didn't realize how late it had gotten when we finally left the place....

With that being said, I am all birthday'd out for at least the next couple of months. Our next family birthday will be Anaya's and she will be three years old...

Before I go, let me tell you a little bit about our birthday girl:

-She loves to read chapter books.

-She likes climbing on things (like our couches, counter-tops, chairs, and even in her closet to sit on the very top shelf)

-She likes and has "boy" toys like matchbox and guns but she likes "girl" things too, like nail polish, make-up, and jewelry

-She is a great help with Anaya. She plays with her and (just recently) changed her diaper without Mama asking

-She likes to sleep with her older sister and she likes making cards and pictures for her.

We love you Zaria. Happy Birthday!!

Happy Birthday Kamelah

Yesterday, my first born daughter turned 9 years old!!! We celebrated at Cici's Pizza with her friends.

We also got to see dadddy on the webcam. It was so great to see him and he was able to wish Kamelah a happy birthday. I love being able to talk to him and see him at the same time...being that he is many many miles away.

So let me tell you a little bit about Kamelah:
-She loves to do arts and crafts projects
-She helps out a lot with the younger ones
-She likes to cook and bake
-She asks lots and lots of questions everyday
-She is very creative
-She is maturing in her walk with the Lord that amazes me and puts me to shame
-I learn a lot from her about stopping and enjoying the little things in life
-And I have learned so much about loving unconditonally and I have seen the Father's love, goodness, and glory shine through her...

I am looking forward to celebrating many more birthday with you Kamelah. I know each day is a gift with you and each moment counts toward eternity. Daddy and I only have a few more years with you to train you up in the way you should go. I will not take the time for granted but continue to sow seeds and love unconditionally...for that is all that matters and what carries us into God's eternal glory.

Much love to my BIG nine year old.

Trials and tribulations

Here I am this morning feeding baby and typing at the same time...multi-tasking proves to be very effective these days when you have four children and a household to run....

Yesterday was a learning experience for me...I have had a lot of those since my man has left, some spiritual and some physical.

I know now not to put your cell phone in the back pocket of your swim shorts before going swimming cuz you could forget about it like I did and then go cellphone-less for a while as you wait and hope it dries out and after three days of waiting you then realize it will not ever work so then you have to go get another one.

I also know now that you should never play a movie for the kids in the car unless the car is started. If you do then your battery could possible die at an inconvient spot (like at a school parking lot) and as you see the last car roll away while starting the car you thank God that at least you now have a working cell phone that will enable you to call and get help....

There were so many more learning lessons that I have gone through this past week like baby car seat anxiety, poop found in odd places as I am potty training my two year old, how to go to the post office with a crying baby and active toddler in tow plus two other kids and wait in line for 15 min. to only discover (as you make your way to the counter) that you forgot to bring in your wallet, and also how to go back to the post office a second time with crying baby and active toddler realizing that you went at nap time, which turned into two crying kids and a post worker laughing about them being in tune with each other....

Whatever trials and tribulations I have experience thus far, I know they have shaped me, molded me, and made me want to be more like Jesus. He was our example on how to live in this dark and depraved world. James 1:2-3 says, "Consider it pure joy, my [sister] whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of [my] faith develops perseverance." My faith needs to be tested, otherwise my faith won't grow and my relationship won't deepen with the Lord.

Trials big and small come to everyone. How we deal with them is what counts in knowing and developing our faith in God...in trusting Him...and in giving Him our problems and worries. I need to "humble [myself] under God's mighty hand, that he may lift me up in due time. [wish I could change due time into my time!!!] Cast all [my] anxiety on him because he cares for [me]. (1Peter 5:6,7)

How can I fathom the love that the Father has for me? He cares for me...He chasens those He loves.

My prayer then needs to be, "Lord, chasen me because I know it will only draw me closer to you..."

missin' you

It has been 11 days since my baby boo left. Only about 354 more days to go....

It has been real nice getting to talk to him about every other day. Hopefully the communication will be even better when he reaches his final destination in a few days. We hope to use the webcam so he can see the kids and so we can see him...

Tomorrow we will officially start school work. I will be making up a "schedule" to somewhat follow as we go through the year. I know life happens and things happen that make us stray off of the schedule but I like to have a guideline of what we need to accomplish each day....

So I better get off of here and get to work as there is much to be done while the kiddos are sleeping.

Much love to you all. And to baby boo: we miss you and are praying for you daily!!!

"Love the Lord your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the Lord is your life." -Deut. 30:20

train up a child

Well it has been a little over a week since my baby boo left. We miss him so much. Little Anaya asks, "Daddy home mama...Daddy home?" whenever she sees his dirty army uniform (which has been in our laundry basket by the laundry room for several days now :) Can't seem to want to wash it just yet...)

We had a great time of swimming and doing school work yesterday. Swimming proves to be motivation to getting schoolwork done. I love that I can spend time with the kids after an hour or so of schoolwork. This gives me a chance to get to know them. I really want to know their hearts, their individuality, their personality and what's on their minds. I want to build a trusting relationship with them for they are growing so fast and will soon be having to make decisions on their own. I hope to train them up in the way they should go so that when they are old they will not depart from God's perfect will for their lives.

I hope to post more soon with pics...

Love,
MK

P.S. We miss you baby boo. Hope to talk to you soon.

My Strong Tower

What a day I had today... The main mission was to get cell phone fixed. Mission not accomplished. I failed to accomplish the mission after many attempts to do so... Which leads me to the topic that I want to talk about. It is about walking in the Spirit and not obeying the flesh especially when things don't go your way. I woke up "ready" for my day to begin. I was in the Word early this morning and wrote some scriptures on notecards to use throughout the day in the car and at home. Lord only knew that I would desperately need them and need Him today. I got the kids ready early today for church so that I could go to the Sprint store. We drove to what I thought was Sprint and ended up at Krispy Creme Donuts instead...(don't ask me how I did that...maybe the kids had some kind of influence in that decision!) So I finally find the Sprint store with a sign that says they are at another location. We live about 20 miles from the city and this location was on the other side of Fayetteville, another 20 miles away. So, to make a long story short I go to the other location after church and lunch and they are closed. I couldn't call them to find out their hours and so my desparate self drives there praying all the way that they would be open... Meanwhile, I have tired and cranky kids who like to get loud and scream and cry in the car. Baby does not like sleeping in his car seat or anywhere out of his comfortable bed. He was up most of the day and crying. I drive to a couple more stores tired and cranky myself, and get no help.
Well before I complain even more I will just say that these moments make me realize how desparate I am for God. At around 5 o'clock I began to fall apart. I was not thinking of walking in the Spirit but just thinking of myself and my circumstance. I took my eyes off of Jesus and thought only of the "storm" that I was in and I started sinking. I know I am an overcomer by the blood of the lamb, I am more than a conquerer, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. I forget though... And so through small and big trials in life I am realizing now that God is bigger than me and my problems. He knows better than me and is in control of my life. He is taking me through these hardships so that it will strengthen my faith and make me stronger. For He, and only He, can help me and deliver me. He is my Rock, my Strong Tower...

Lil' Philip and Kamelah at the pool